Paula has a number of biscuits in the oven and boy oh boy are they big and flaky. Here’s the first batch Paula just served America hot from the oven:
- Everyone is racist; we just don’t know it – yet. The law of physics says in all things there is balance. All good and bad exists within the universe, the world, families and our individual selves. We call the ‘bad stuff’ shadows. For example, if we feel hate towards someone we believe is racist, we either hate ourselves for doing something similar now or in the past, or we could hate ourselves if we engaged in that behavior in the future. If given the right set of conditions, each of us could be racist. FYI – the harder we try not to be racist, the bigger the flag waves.
- You teach people how to treat you. Ms. Deen effectively told Matt Lauer in her interview that she hears black people call each other ‘the N word’ all of the time. Her question was basically: How is she supposed to know not to use it when it’s being used frequently around her by the person(s) who say they don’t want others to use the word to reference them?
- Move on. At some point, just take responsibility for who you are, what you did or have done, who you have become, who you aspire to be and the different parts of you that show up along the way. Learn the lesson and accept the gifts it brings.
- Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt. See No. 1, the deposition transcript and Today Show interview.
- Everyone has a boss. “Hello Mr./Mrs. Customer! We are so happy you chose to do business with us. How can we make you love us even more?”
- Crying doesn’t work the way it used to. There used to be a time that when a woman cried, there was an out-pour of sympathy. Now, it’s “Toughen up, sister…put your big girl panties on! If you’re going to play with the big boys you can’t cry foul.” I respect Martha Stewart in that way but then again she scares me.
- Whenever marginalized groups unite, the powerful elite gets their ass kicked; or at least taken down a few notches. That is all.
- Consumer spending is the new corporate moral compass. We can thank diversity efforts and financial education in low-income and middle class communities for teaching them that they have value and are not victims.
- Your entire life can change in an instant. Be careful who you step on up as you climb the ladder because they are the same folks you pass on your way down. And for some reason, they have great memories.
- The world is your mirror; what you see is who you are. We are imperfect whole beings and that is perfectly normal (never mind my corny oxymoron). When we see racism, hate and fear in the world, we see parts of ourselves that we have denied and need to acknowledge. When we see love, trust, compassion, and beauty in the world we are seeing parts of ourselves in that image, too.
In all seriousness, this blog isn’t about Paula Deen. She’s not going to miss a meal or end up homeless – in the end she will be just fine. Let’s just hope she’s wiser for the ware. Maybe she will use some of her free time to dig deep into her shadow and uncover the gifts this journey has brought her.
Instead, this blog is about you and the parts of you that are screaming to be accepted, understood and unwrapped. It is easy to target someone like Paula because she is a public figure. What is difficult is looking in the mirror and facing our own shadows because they are there. Ms. Deen just reflected them back to you. And for that, I thank her for being the most recent mirror in which America sees its shadows.
What shadows do you see when you look at Paula Deen? Do tell!