Many people begin the new year with some sort of resolution and a few of you may resolve to find better ways to work with your boss. Here are a few tips to help you better work with boss who can be a monster…
The first thing to keep in mind is you are the only one who can control you. You may be unable to control what others do, but you can control how you respond. If things get tense and your boss becomes relentless, it’s important to remember that one of two things could be happening with your him or her: 1. You really pissed off your boss and didn’t get the memo or 2. Something happened to them and they are projecting how they feel about themselves or another situation onto you.
In either case, you can do something about how you respond to the situation. Your response may in turn positively affect how your boss feels about and treats you in the future. Before you begin ‘doing’ anything, take a few minutes to think: When was the last time you and your boss really got along with each other? What was good in the relationship at that time? Then remember the situation right after that when the relationship changed, what happened?
Those two memories serve as the time frame wherein something happened. Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to figure out what ‘that’ was.
Now, it is important that you read what I am about to write very carefully and answer the question honestly: Could you have done anything to warrant your boss’ reaction? If you did, you need to own it. Owning your role means you take full responsibility for your behavior without excuse. If you didn’t do anything, then chances are your boss may be going through a tough time. Either way, both of you need to address the relationship as it stands and figure out how to better deal with challenges moving forward.
Regardless of whether or not you did something that warrants their reaction, you should talk with your boss (use your best judgment regarding your approach). Let your boss know that you notice either a change or a problem in the relationship and you have been thinking about it. Ask if you both could talk about what may have happened between you. This should open the door to a decent conversation.
If after you’ve tried everything you can to make it work and your boss is still giving you unnecessary grief, it may be time to talk with your human resources department or find a great therapist.
Have you ever worked for a monster boss or knew someone who did? Do tell!